when mikayla was 4 i asked her the following questions about me. her
responses are in all caps. now that mt is 4, i asked him the same
questions. his responses are in italics. notice his fixation on
pooting. i assure you it is his dad’s influence, not mine.
1. What is something mom always says to you?
I LOVE YOU AND PLEASE STOP GROWING
i love you and you make my heart happy2. What makes mom happy?
ME, MT, AND CHOCOLATE COVERED STRAWBERRIES
when i share3. What makes mom sad?
WHEN I DON’T GIVE YOU LOVE
when i don’t let somebody play with my toys4. How does your mom make you laugh?
TICKLING ME
blowing raspberries on my belly5. What was your mom like as a child?
CRAZY
you were making jewelry6. How old is your mom?
17
3 pounds7. How tall is your mom?
1 FEET TALL
6 feet tall8. What is her favorite thing to do?
COLOR WITH ME, MAKE JEWELRY WITH ME, PLAY WITH ME
pray with me9. What does your mom do when you’re not around?
READ A BOOK, GO ON A DATE WITH DADDY
poot on daddy and make chocolate covered strawberries10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
(AFTER EXPLAINING WHAT IT MEANT TO BE FAMOUS)…BECAUSE YOU ARE A GOOD MOMMY
being a girl11. What is your mom really good at?
MAKING JEWELRY AND READING BOOKS REALLY FAST, FIXING THINGS
spankings and praying with me12. What is your mom not very good at?
I DON’T KNOW
working a telescope13. What does your mom do for a job?
SCHOOL AND MAKE STUFF FOR ALL THE PEOPLE AT JOURNEY AND GIVE MONEY TO KIDS AT AWANAS
pooting on people and teaching about god14.What is your mom’s favorite food?
CHICKEN AND RICE
guacomole15.What makes you proud of your mom?
SOMETIMES YOU TAKE A NAP WITH ME AND YOU FIX STUFF WITH ME
when you poot on daddy it makes me proud of you16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS
lightning mcqueen17. What do you and your mom do together?
PLAY, DO ART STUFF TOGETHER
we poot on each other and snuggle and wrestle and you rock me in our chair18. How are you and your mom the same?
WE BOTH HAVE DARK HAIR AND WE HAVE THE SAME COLOR SKIN
we both love jesus19. How are you and your mom different?
WE DON’T HAVE THE SAME LIPSTICK, AND YOU DON’T LIKE US TO EAT CANDY FOR BREAKFAST
because we are not the same person
20. How do you know your mom loves you?
BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS SAY THAT AND YOU ALWAYS STEAL ALL MY KISSES UNTIL I DON’T HAVE NO MORE
because you say i love you everyday and you poot on me and wrestle with me and play the animal game with me21. What does your mom like most about your dad?
YOU LIKE IT WHEN HE TICKLES YOU AND HE IS HANDSOME AND BECAUSE HE KISSES YOU. YOU LIKE IT WHEN HE DOES THE DISHES.
kissing22. Where is your mom’s favorite place to go?
TARGET AND THE BEACH
the beach with me